Diary 57

Diary 57

Thursday, May 14th

The days tend to blend into each other, somewhat, and I’m reminded that in the not-so-distant past agricultural communities had to work hard to keep the shape of their week recognizable. The Sunday or Sabbath anchored the week, and preparations for it (cleaning, getting one’s clothes in order, preparing the meal that marked the day) were as inflexible as any office schedule. 

We’re still not quite ready for this, the new self-regulation. Neighbors ask me if this is recycling week or is that next week? And so on. It’s easy to lose track.

Not that this is necessarily bad. I’ve found myself having to make ‘set’ times for exercise. And it works well.  Previously I’d have got in my car, driven to work, walked a few hundred yards to the office, worked, come home tired out – convinced I’d had plenty of physical exercise. I hadn’t.  I was just mentally tired. The external locus of control and valuation had taken over. Now I have to choose to stay fit, and take action to do so.

Old habits are being dissolved.

For me it feels as if I’m taking more charge of my life, for the first time for years.